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You Can Fake Caring, But You Can't Fake Showing Up

I had an interesting interaction over the weekend and I realize I need to reassure you all that I’m really okay. If you read my last post, you know that last week was tough. I saw a friend on Friday night that had obviously read my blog (which is fantastic, btw!). She hugged me, which I appreciate, but I could see a look of worry in her eyes. I had not anticipated any one worrying about me, because I suppose I’m not worried about me. I could be completely wrong, and if I am, please keep worrying about me, but I feel like I have my head on straighter than I ever have. I feel in control of my life and my destiny. I have taken a step back to truly assess my life in order to make decisions that can help to enhance my and my family’s happiness. I have been brutally honest with myself while assessing my situation. I have a very keen awareness of my environment and the people surrounding me. While I’d love to look at the world with rose colored glasses, I’m really very pragmatic. Everyone has gifts and I feel fortunate that mine is discernment. I believe I got it from my dad. He had the ability to size up people and situations very quickly and he was always right. I don’t propose that I’m always right, but I’m pretty good at it too. That being said, don’t worry about me, but thank you if you did!

Enough about that! Let’s move on and talk about my downsizing efforts! I’ve learned some great things already. One of the benefits of my busy schedule is that I cannot rush through this process. I simply don’t have the spare time at home to finish this quickly. This is good for me because I’ve never been a patient person. I like to make decisions and act on them immediately, then move on to my next project. In doing that, I fail to spend enough time in the present moment to appreciate all that I have and be grateful. I find that in my head, I’m usually living two steps ahead. That’s a great mindset at work, but at home it isn’t so great. I want to savor every moment with my family and friends. I am making a concerted effort to do that. This weekend is a great example. I finally had a weekend at home without work obligations and the Alabama football game was out of town. This would have been a great time to clean out closets and get rid of stuff. However, we were invited to two weddings, a birthday party, and a christening. I’m not going to lie to you all about the true me and I will tell you that in the past, this would have been a complete nuisance to me. I would’ve been annoyed that I couldn’t do exactly what I wanted and work towards my goal of downsizing. It’s rare for me to have a whole weekend free so to have to everyone fill it up with their events that I feel obligated to attend would’ve made me grumpy. It’s not that I don’t care about them because I’m happy for them. Truth is, I could be pretty selfish sometimes. As I work to live more in the present and appreciate my family and friends, I made a clear decision to attend as many of these events as I can and to not worry in the least that I’m accomplishing nothing towards my downsizing goal. I’m so glad I did this! Yesterday’s birthday party was so fun and I grew closer to family. Last night’s wedding was beautiful and a blast! We were able to spend time with some important friends in our life that we haven’t seen in several years. Today will be more time with family and I’m looking forward to it! I’m not stressed at all that I have done absolutely nothing at home and it looks like a storm blew through! This week I heard a great phrase that I promise to internalize and do my best to live by – “You can fake caring, but you can’t fake showing up.” Who knew that downsizing would teach me this?! Love it!

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